The Crown of Pearls

IT WAS LIKE EVERYTHING MOVED IN SLOW MOTION.
Mara was about to cross the street when she saw a little girl on the other side. She looked like a small Barbie doll, with her silvery-blond hair that had soft curls ended above her shoulders. Her wide ocean blue eyes were dazzling. Even for a child, she would pass as a model. She seemed like she was looking at something beside Mara. The girl then looked at Mara, much to her surprise.

When their eyes met, Mara was rooted to the ground. She felt like her arms and legs weighed a thousand pounds each. She knew she probably looked like an idiot, gaping at a child like that, but she couldn’t just will her eyes to move, and her whole body for that matter.

The girl started walking towards her. She walked slowly, as if making each step required all her determination and willpower. Then Mara heard it.

It was the loud honking of a truck. It was ascending fast towards the girl!

The little girl seemed oblivious to everything. She didn't even turn or look at the truck. She was still walking.

"RUN!!!"

Mara shouted at the top of her lungs. But the girl didn't seem to hear her.

Mara could hear her every heart beat. The truck was going to hit the girl if this continued!

Mara weighed her options carefully. If she saved the girl, she knew too well that both of them would not survive. The truck was coming fast and she doubted that it’ll stop in time. It would mean that if she ran and tried to save the girl, she would die in the attempt. The impact would be too hard for anyone to survive. But, if she didn’t, she knew that this moment would haunt her for the rest of her life. She couldn’t just stand there and do nothing! The sight of the girl, dead, bathed in her own blood, she knew that she won’t live it down. She would be haunted by her conscience forever.

Mara was taking too much time thinking. She had to act now, or else.

Mara knew that she’ll die saving this girl.

I’m sorry, Mom and Brian. But I have to do this. I hope you’ll forgive me. I love the both of you very much, and I’m sure that wherever I go after I’m dead, I’ll miss you. But I really do have to do this. Goodbye.

Mara ran.

Mara was surprised to realize that she was still alive. She was supposed to be hit by the truck by now, but here she was, still running and breathing. Mara started hoping that both of them will get out of this incident alive.

She lifted the child and jumped to the other end of the street. That was when she realized how stupid she was.

There was a lamp post directly where they'll land! She hugged the child and prepared herself for the fall. She positioned herself so that she would be the one that would hit the post and not the girl. She had a bigger chance of surviving. She just hoped that all that milk she drank made her bones strong. She closed her eyes and prayed that she'll get to open them again.

Oh, God, please let us survive. Please.

Mara felt a pang of pain in the back of her head. She realized that blood was flowing from the wound. The little light that remained when she closed her eyes disappeared, and nothing was left.

**********

Mara was floating.

It was a very wonderful feeling. It was like lying in a bed of clouds. The scent of the place was breathtaking. It smelled like Freesia and Daffodils.

I must be in Heaven.

Then that meant she was dead, right? Mara thought so. Her happy bubble suddenly exploded.

If she really was in Heaven, then she would never see everyone again. She would never hear her mom's laugh, her brother's teasing, and she would never see Cornelia's smile and all her classmates and teachers. Without even knowing it, she was crying.

She cried for her life. She cried for everyone she left behind. And most of all, she cried for her future.

She had a life! She was a good girl, she followed her mom and brother, and she did what was expected of her! What did she do to deserve this fate?! She cried even harder, until she felt she could cry no more.

Then she didn’t survive the accident after all. It must have been the wound she got when she hit the post that killed her. Mara’s only hope now was that the girl was alive. She had to be. If not, then her sacrifice would be all for nothing.

She had to be alive. Then she can tell my family about what I did. Maybe when they see that I died for another’s life, they’ll forgive me.

Time passed. It could have been minutes, days, months or even years. But it didn't matter to Mara. She was dead. Nothing mattered.

Feathers suddenly fell from nowhere, and they were all glowing. She forgot for a while that she was dead and just enjoyed the sight.

She caught a feather in between her hands. It was soft to touch. She felt her senses become more alive. Like having an adrenaline rush, or being drunk. She felt like she was filled with nothing but pure joy.

The feather then exploded into rays of light. All of a sudden, she found herself in the edge a cliff.

When she realized where she was, Mara trembled. She was terribly afraid of heights.

When she finally found the courage to look, her eyes widened with longing.

Below the cliff was the whole town of Guinevere. She could even see her house, and blocks from it she could see her school. Even the mall, the park, they were all visible.

Mara couldn’t help staring at her house. It was unmistakable. Their house was the only one in the whole town of Guinevere with a yellow roof. It was five years ago that the roof was painted, when she was only nine years old. They were arguing about what color the roof was to be painted. Brian wanted black, her mother dark green, and she bright yellow. They decided to just pick lots from a hat since they couldn’t decide. And it turned out that what Brian picked was bright yellow. Mara smiled at the memory.

Mara gazed at her house with love and regret. She now wished that she didn’t go to that route the way home. Then she would have never seen that incident, and she would be alive right now, inside her home, eating with Brian. They would be watching TV or doing homework together. Instead, here she was, dead, and Brian was probably in the morgue this very moment.

Mara couldn’t help crying. Brian would be so sad, and it was all her fault. And her mom would be heartbroken. Her mother worked hard for her future, and what did she do? She killed herself. How ungrateful and stupid.

Mara knew there was nothing left to do now but move on. She couldn’t just stare at her house forever. She made the choice, and then she had to accept the consequences. She had to leave.

When she turned around, she saw the sight she wished to see once more all her life.

There was her father, smiling cheerfully at her. Her father passed away when she was still a child, so she barely knew him. But it was unmistakable. With the chestnut hair, dark eyes and perfect nose, he looked like an older version of her brother, except that her father wore glasses. It was her father. She knew it.

She ran and hugged her father tightly, like she knew that she wouldn’t get another chance. She was beyond happy.

"Father!"

"Oh Mara, sweetheart. How I've longed to see you! You're a young lady now. When I last saw you, you were just a little girl."

When Mara's excitement ceased, she started bombarding her father with questions.

"Are we dead? Is this heaven?"

"Not exactly sweetheart. I'm dead, but you're not."

"What do you mean?"

"You're still in limbo, my dear. You see, you have to choose whether you want to stay or leave. Choose wisely, Mara. Not everyone gets a second chance like you."

"But, father, we just met. I can't just leave you."

"Sweetheart, the longer you stay here, the more you'll lose your will to live. Sooner or later you may never want to leave this place. You'll lose your memories in the process."

"I don't understand."

"Tell me, sweetheart, when's your brother's birthday?"

There was a long pause before this question was answered. Mara's voice was hoarse when she replied, evidently hesitant to respond.

"I can't remember."

"See, sweetheart? Soon, you'll lose all your memories. Your essence. Your identity. You have to choose now."

"How?"

"Listen to your heart, my child. It will show you the way."

Mara then faced the cliff. She closed her eyes and tried to listen. She knew that she had to live, for everyone. But then, she just met her father, she couldn’t just leave him. Choosing between the two was so hard. She felt like she was being torn apart.

Mara tried to remember everyone that she had left behind: her mother, Brian, Cornelia, her teachers, her classmates, and her neighbors. Mara could see them all clearly, but the longer she thought of them, the more blurred the memory became. It was like a fog was slowly seeping into her memories.

No, I can’t forget them. They loved me and took care of me. They made me happy. They made me who I am. NO. I will not forget them. Never.

When she opened her eyes at last, she knew the answer. She would have to live.

Mara turned around to say goodbye to her father. But when she did, he was already gone.

"Thank you, Father. I love you."

Mara then slowly walked to the edge of the cliff. She felt sick. Heights made her tremble.

But she knew she had to be strong. For everyone.

Doubt then seeped into her mind. What if she fell for eternity? Or worse, what if she fell on the ground? That would surely hurt.

Silly, you're almost or as good as dead. You won't feel a thing.

She closed her eyes and jumped.